Saturday, May 24, 2008

Purity

I started out at a private college in Nashville, TN. Almost two hours from home, my grandfather still knew the families of friends I made there. One of these friends--I'll call her Ruth--happened to be the daughter of the Purity Dairies business, makers of my favorite brand of ice cream growing up.

This private college was also very religious. I had six credits of Bible after the first semester. For spring break that year Ruth, myself, and some other friends, all with two first names of course, drove to Panama City Beach, FL.

Ruth drove since she had the largest SUV. One night while we drove, or stalled along the strip, some guys leaned into the open windows. Apparently they wanted a "look at all the virgins." How'd they know we were pure and innocent?

Clearly Purity Dairies wasn't as popular that far South. Ruth's license plate--PURITY--was taken for an advertisement of chastity instead of milk.
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Water People

I've never waited a table. You wouldn't want me to. But I imagine that waiters have their own lingo and codes. My boyfriend and I were on the receiving end of what could only be the unfavorable type of customer at an expensive restaurant, the--we'll just be having water customer. It's not that one meal at M&S was out of our league, especially since it was lunch. It wasn't that soup and salad was all we could afford. If anything, the waiter could have had a bigger tip because we weren't spending as much as we're used to on dining out. Needless to say after being ignored--Nobel Prize winner Weisel says indifference is worse than being treated with anger--and complimentary bread deprived, we did not leave a tip.

So here it is now--if people order water on a Saturday afternoon it might just be because they're hung over and saving room for a friend's pasta bolognese later.